Beneath

Spent a lot of time up on the surface lately, previous to my departure I had a crazy few weeks that left me feeling burnt out and disillusioned with what we were doing.

I have spent time enjoying the weather, spending time with my family. All the while trying to push past how I feel, trying to find that spark again that drives me, it has been, difficult. Even more so when those I talk to for support feel the same way themselves, it’s easy to be drawn in and settle in that rut.

The other day I was stood out on the porch of our house on the phone to my parents in England, it was raining heavily and I felt the urge to return to Fahets. I had left on the eve of heading out into the Age further and exploring new areas for people to one day walk along, I had left my studies on the Age abandoned and I thought is this a healthy mentality to have, countless Ages to explore and are we to throw them aside when we grow bored of them?

So today I decided to head back down into the cavern, my previous notions about venturing out of the shadows to meet people had reversed, I now find comfort in the dark recesses of the cavern.
I decided to take a walk through one of the hoods, gaze out over the stretch of orange lake try and find that feeling I had when I first came down here, a feeling that has eluded me for years and continues to do so.
But I wasn’t as alone as I thought, as I walked towards the fountain area I spied a solitary Bahro staring at me, watching.
I walked up to him/her and it didn’t flee, just stood there chittering slightly, as I walked around him/her he/she moved around to face me. We stood there for several minutes in each others company, with I not saying a word (despite my desires to be able to actually communicate with them) before the Bahro vanished from view and I returned to Sul to turn in for the night.